How to have self-confidence in 5 steps?

 Self-confidence is very important for personal growth.

Without it, it is very difficult to move forward in your projects, in your life and to be happy.

Fortunately, by adopting the techniques described in this article, you will be able to  boost self-confidence  and  reveal the best of yourself!

Indeed,  self-confidence is worked and improved on a daily basis.  The process is long but beneficial.

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So, are you ready to check out our tips?

How to be self-confident?

We invite you to answer the question how to be self-confident in a 5-step process.

Step 1: believe in your projects and have clear objectives

The first step in knowing how to have self-confidence is to take a look at everything, to question yourself deeply and to set clear goals.

In his book “Think and Become Rich”, Napoleon Hill explains that  to achieve a goal, no matter how big, you need to: 

  1. 1
    Have this goal in mind;
  2. 2
    Visualize, feel the happiness and the effects of achieving the goal;
  3. 3
    Put in place a plan, as precise and detailed as possible;
  4. 4
    Set a deadline;
  5. 5
    Take action.

This process can also be used to build self-confidence.

Here's how to apply this plan to gain more self-confidence: 

  1. 1
    Set yourself a goal of developing your self-confidence and define what will allow you to be proud of your actions;
  2. 2
    Try to imagine yourself and feel the happiness of being a fulfilling, confident person;
  3. 3
    Take a look at all your activities, your life and your surroundings.
    Try to see the actions to take that will allow you to achieve this goal;
  4. 4
    Set yourself small goals to move forward step by step. Eliminate what weighs you down.
  5. 5
    Set short deadlines for each of your actions.
  6. 6
    Improving your self-confidence often involves stepping out of your comfort zone.
    The fear of change will catch you back. Fight it and keep moving forward!

Understanding how to have self-confidence goes through understanding the factors that have reduced that confidence.

This may be : 

  • Education;
  • A health problem;
  • Little rewarding work;
  • Truncated studies;
  • Toxic relationships

Every consequence (here your lack of confidence) has a direct cause.

This is why  taking stock of your life is essential. 

Define the causes of your lack of self-confidence and: 

If the cause is still present, eliminate it from your life.

  • If the cause is old (education, emotional deprivation or truncated studies for example) then you can already move on to the implementation phase of your new projects.

Setting new goals, in line with your principles and what you really want to do and become is central to building self-confidence.

Finally, stop lamenting your fate.

Even if you are going through or have been through difficult things,  you still have the power to pick yourself up  and move on to new, healthier and more rewarding goals.

Step 2: stop putting limiting beliefs

When you take stock of your desires and goals , there are a  lot of things  that will go through your mind that you will want to do, but  will rule out.

Why? 

Quite simply because you are going to say to yourself: “ I will never be able to do that ”.

This is called  a limiting belief.  It comes from our education, from society and sometimes from those around it.

It is by combating this form of self-censorship that we can answer the question of how to have self-confidence.

However, everything can be learned in life!

With strength and will, it is possible to accomplish absolutely anything that one sets out to do.

So for sure, if you are 40 years old, it will be difficult for you to retrain as a professional football player.

But apart from these exceptions,  it's never too late to do the things that you are passionate about.

Of course, confronting these limiting beliefs is  a long-term job.

To get there, you will have to take  small steps , gradually gain self-confidence!

Step  3: go  step by step

As we mentioned earlier, working on your self-confidence involves stepping out of your comfort zone.

Still, getting out of this comfort zone is mentally very difficult.

If you are afraid of public speaking, your goal of doing a television interview is probably excessive and premature.

You will be able to do this, the goal being to eliminate his limiting beliefs. But it must be done intelligently.

Here is what you can set up: 

  • Set yourself an ambitious long-term goal;
  • Break this goal down into small steps;
  • Break down these steps into very concrete tasks, which will help you progress little by little.

The goal is that stepping out of this comfort zone is neither too long nor too engaging for you.

  1. 1
    By doing small tasks regularly, you will get used to these new tasks which will then become your new comfort zone.
  2. 2
    You can then go a little further, gradually.
  3. 3
    The upper frame of the matrix is ​​colored in red, the central frame in orange, and the lower frame in green.

Every time you step out of your comfort zone, it will be a first victory towards your personal growth and improving your self-confidence.


Step  4:  value yourself after each success

We have already answered the question of how to gain self-confidence.

However, there are still two fundamental steps to follow.

First,  personal development  is a very important axis.

It is impossible to gain self-confidence while constantly devaluing yourself!

When you force yourself out of your comfort zone to perform an action, no matter how small: 

  • See this action as a success;
  • Set up small rewards every time you take the plunge;
  • Congratulate yourself on moving towards your goals

Every step you take towards your goal allows you to reveal the best version of yourself!

Likewise, on a daily basis, do not hesitate: 

  • To encourage you;
  • To tell you positive and motivating sentences

It's called Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP).

If this science is quite controversial, it is undeniable that  valuing yourself and saying positive things to yourself is a factor  that can only improve your self-confidence  ! 

Step  5:  surround yourself with the right people

Finally, last tip, and not the least, is to surround yourself with the right people.

A famous personal development coach once said this very interesting sentence: 

“We are the average of the 5 people we hang out with the most.”

Jim Rohn

Whether or not this statement is scientifically true, it is interesting in many ways: 

  • There is no denying that surrounding yourself with the right people can only be positive for our mindset.
  • Conversely, surrounding yourself with negative, grieving, pessimistic or even toxic people will not allow you to have a very fulfilling mentality.
  • The human being is a social animal by nature. We are very influenced by our fellow human beings and we learn a lot of things by imitation.

Assume that you will need to surround yourself with positive people who have the skills you need to grow.

These people will also know how to value you, help you and will be non-judgmental.

But then, how to find these people you will tell me?

There are many ways: 

  • During specific events in the area where you want to improve;
  • Professional dating applications (Shapr for example);
  • Friends of your entourage that you meet at parties

The goal is above all to  become more sociable , more open to others and to want to surround yourself well. From there,  the opportunities will present themselves to you! 

In conclusion

Answering the question how to gain self-confidence is both simple and complex.

If you follow this process, you will eventually get there.

But this process is long and requires a certain rigor and a strong will.

Face your fears, step out of your comfort zone, eliminate harmful things from your life, surround yourself with the right people, take care of yourself and your mind.

In my opinion, here are the keys to knowing how to have self-confidence.

And you, do you have personal development experiences to share with us?

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